Humor Me

I wish they all could be California, I mean Oklahoma, girls ...

Last night, a second straight Miss Oklahoma -- Lauren Nelson -- was named Miss America. What are the odds of that? Especially in a contest with celebrity judges such as MSNBC talk-show host Chris Matthews, obviously well-suited for determining the perfect female.

Shilah Phillips, the Miss Texas from Frisco, was the first runner-up. Alabama's Melinda Toole was named Miss Congeniality and Kentucky's Tara Conner was named Miss Inebriality.

No wait, that's not right. Conner is actually the reigning Miss USA, and she's now out of rehab and said she's feeling like a completely different person. That means she's ready to fulfill her duties as Miss USA, which should include explaining to everyone the difference between Miss America and Miss USA.