Humor Me

According to this Web site, Kelly Clarkson "was so depressed after a show on her last U.S. tour she cancelled a planned meet and greet with fans and instead locked herself in a bathroom and wrote about her feelings."

Good thinking, Kelly C. It's always good to have a cathartic moment once in a while. And it turned out to be productive, because she wrote a song called "Irvine."

The song is about a bad breakup, and because it was written inside a bathroom stall -- perhaps even on toilet paper -- maybe it will have this line:

Your love I will flush away,
and bring back a sunny day,
Now I'm done with your lies and your harmin',
and you won't be squeezing my Charmin

Call me, Kelly. I've got other potential career disasters to offer.