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Classmates, I'm not deceased

When my 10-year high school reunion came around, I decided to skip it. I couldn’t take time off work, and more important, I was not yet a millionaire.

But now …

Well, I’m still not a millionaire. But after talking to a high school friend, I think that I better not miss my 20-year reunion in a few years.

My friend (I’ll call him Lyle to protect his identity) told me that he didn’t go to the reunion either. But the day after the reunion, Kyle – oops, I mean Lyle – got a call from his parents.

Are you OK, they asked?

Apparently Lyle was on the deceased list at the reunion.

It was either some very bad information or a very elaborate prank, but it gave me an idea. Maybe I could get my name on the deceased list at the next reunion, then show up in a disguise and listen to what people really thought of me.

Unfortunately, this is what I would probably hear:

“Uh … Matt who?”

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